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I don't understand how fate works.

lucastp_5322010-07-04 19:19:38 +0000 #1
over the years i have experienced that every thing happens exactly the opposite of what it think. this is because i add either excitement to my thoughts or some happy emotion. if i am expecting something good to happen to me it happens exactly the opposite. if i expect a profit of 10,000 it turns out to be a loss . this happens in most of the cases , even my relations. is there any way i can over come this ? .
lucastp_5322010-07-04 19:27:55 +0000 #2
to add to this it also happens that if i think of amy girl whom i like she goes away from me ,and if i stop thinking she comes back to me. but it is not possible that i like a girl and dont think of her , is there any way by which i can avoid this, or break this law which is in my life for years. its more like a curse to me and i cant get rid of it.
Hubert2010-07-04 19:40:35 +0000 #3
Well, that's the point. It is fate because we do not know it. If we knew it, we would try to cheat it, somehow.

But using your given example, the answer is in the question you asked.

Don't think of the girl, don't think of the ten grands, and they'll come to you, if that is your destiny. And if they do not come, you are still at no loss, because you were not expecting them anyway.

You see, your problem is that you think you'll be only happy if you have the girl and the money. But that's just excitment, what builds attachment, and that leads to pain. Think of happiness what is lasting. The only lasting happiness is the knowledge of the Self, and acting from the Self. Anything else is just a distraction.

But we can't just do this, because if it was this simple, the world would be full of realized souls.

What we can do, is to start towards this goal, and make small steps every day, through discrimination, dispassion, and unattached actions emerging from these.

We must learn the joy of letting things come and go. Every time when we let something go, with no regrets, we make space for a little portion of peace and light in ourselves.
lucastp_5322010-07-04 20:09:43 +0000 #4
Don't think of the girl, don't think of the ten grands, and they'll come to you, if that is your destiny.

but i some what dont trust in destiny, destiny is a effect of karma, if i do not act i will never get what i am destined for , u say of self realization, but i am the eldest son and need to take care of me family, id love to do tapasya but i am bound by my obligations to my family, so what i understand is that i need to do my job without expecting any results. but when i fail to do what i am supposed , when i make the wrong choice , that i when i regret, for some reason i always end up making the worng choice as if it were forced upoun me.

so tell me is it possible that i become rich by just trusting destiny , dont u think that i should carve my own niche or create my own destiny .
Hubert2010-07-04 20:21:49 +0000 #5
I have to work too. I have a family to sustain. I am the only employed male in my and my wife's family. Our parents grow old. So I have to think of the family, as the head of the family. I have responsabilities, to try to make their life acceptable. Food, shelter, medicine, you know. Maybe a holiday trip per year, too, but not necessarily.

If your question is how to perform your duty ... well, everyone has to work, to think, to use any talents what has been given to us. Don't be afraid. I am a christian, and Jesus said: Everything what you need, will be given to you, as God knows better what you need, than you do. He also said, ask and you will recieve. As the apostle James teaches, we are miserable as we do not ask, or if we ask, we ask for the wrong things, to gratify our desires through the senses.

He does not teach inaction, laziness, just an assurance that your efforts, if sincere, will be rewarded. I am not trying to convert you, I just use these as examples. I am sure any reasonable hindu will agree with these teachings.

Of course you'll meet difficulties, we all do. Sometimes that shows our path is not what we should be on. Sometimes they make us stronger so we can bear greater responsabilities. Sometimes we must fail and suffer terribly to realize that God is our only refuge, as Lord Krishna said.

So do whatever you can for those you are responsible for, ask God (Brahman) to help you in this, seek your motives if they are indeed sincere, and you cannot fail. If you still fail, while doing everything you are able than God must have some other purpose for you. But first do everything you can, and watch for God's hands, as He often gives help from directions you would not expect. Be open, and flexible in your thought. A little change in the attitude of a business partner or client ... this might be His work. Use it.

A seemingly stupid idea what you'd usually throw away ... think twice. Opportunity is everywhere, we just have to learn to percieve them, and use them.

God bless you, my friend, may you find the way you are destined to walk.

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